White_flowers

I stand at the head of the church, dressing up, in my best shoes.
I reach into my pocket and pull out a prepared speech.
My feelings for you writing in blue ink on white paper.
The note reads:
From the bonnet of my car, I feel like I’m on top of the world.
I don’t remember I summer night like this in all my life.
Blue is the sky with the stars setting the mood, the city lights stagnant in the valley below.
It’s as if the world is still, paused in this moment for you and I.

Black is your hair, and your face is beautiful.
We laugh about nothings, and point out our stars.
This picnic rug of steal will forever be my favorite place.
Smooth and white, warm from the drive up here, and scratched from our belts.
If anything I’d say it’s increased in value, ever line a memory of a conversation I hold to
my heard.

Our embrace is simple, light and loving. It’s always the little things for us.
A brush of a hand, a hand placed gently on a hip, a soft kiss on the forehead.
Little reassurances without words that are straight to the point.
Our eyes are windows to our every thought, but only to each other.

An image burned into my memory, a painting forever hung in my heart.
This will forever remain the present for you and I, these feelings, the way I look at you.
We may get old together but for me, you will always be sitting next to me on that
summer’s night, careless, peaceful, secure and loved.
I finish reading, and the crowd remains silent,
I turn to the priest next to me and he nods with approval.
I fidget with my ring finger in anticipation of what is next.
I’ve never see so much of our family in the one place. My best friend at my right side and
your farther to my left.
Everyone still remains silent, a few wipe tears from their eyes.

I take a few steps forward, and reach for the white flowers.
I scroll the note and tie it to the Lilly’s that are placed on the oak that is your coffin.
As I nod to the rest of the coffin bearers to assist with the walk out to the Hurst.
A single tear rolls down my check. I promised I wouldn’t cry for you when you were
gone… this is the first promise I ever broke to you.
Sorry.